Learning from Bonnie Cordon

Background

I volunteer for my local congregation of the The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I am lucky enough to have been asked to be a part of the Young Women organization, where I get to teach and work with some of the best young women ever! The program I participate with includes girls between the ages of 12 and 18 that worship in our local congregation. Because of my work with these youth, I was invited to participate in a training session with Bonnie Cordon, the President of the Church's Young Women program. She is in charge of the Church's young women throughout the whole world. This was a pretty big deal! She works directly with the prophet, who leads and guides the entire church by divine direction.

Sister Cordon talked mostly about several church-wide policy adjustments that are affecting the youth programs. Here are some of the things she touched on:

Sorry I couldn't get a better picture, Sister Cordon!

Summary

The Church handbook explains that "All Church leaders are called to help other people become 'true followers of … Jesus Christ' (Moroni 7:48)." This is our most important job as leaders in the Church! Everything we do points back to Jesus Christ. After we draw near unto Him, we can then bring others to experience the joy He brings.

We must prepare spiritually. We can learn from the example of Alma and the sons of Mosiah. Sister Cordon used Alma 17:2-3 to lead a discussion about how we can prepare. By following the example found here, we will be blessed with joy and have a powerful effect on others.

It's important to remember that we don't make large spiritual leaps all at once. Progress takes time and comes gradually.

The most important thing our youth need to know is that they are literal spiritual children of God. Understanding their true identity is powerful!

The purpose of calling each class by the name "Young Women" is to bring unity. Having a name/label to separate each class from each other can have the effect of creating "-ites". In other words, it can make unity more difficult.

Every word of the new theme is exactly as God wants it to be.

Young Women class presidencies should essentially be running the program. Our job as leaders is to lead, guide, and walk beside them as they work. Help them succeed without taking over!

My Two Cents

I wish I could relay the true feelings I experienced during this meeting. Sister Cordon made me feel like she cared about me personally. I can't explain it. I didn't even get to talk to her one on one, or shake her hand. But when she stood in front of us, she introduced herself by saying "I'm Bonnie Cordon." For some reason, it felt like she was introducing herself as a friend. The tone was very personable. The only way I can think to describe it is that it really felt like she was introducing herself as if we didn't know her. As if none of us had ever heard her name before, or already associated it with the position she held. She exuded love and humility, and invited a spirit of belonging. We hadn't even begun the meeting, and I knew I would enjoy every minute.

Here are just a few of my favorite takeaway's from the discussion:

The female leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints actually direct their organization. Maybe it's because I've heard so often from critics that our church is run by old men and that all women are subject to men in their callings, but I sort of had a view of our female leaders as being a pretty face. Women who smiled and said kind things and traveled around hugging people all over the world. Basically women who just did as the men told them to do. 

I don't think that anymore. 

As Sister Cordon described the revelatory process for many of the recent adjustments in the Young Women program, it was clear that she is the one who made the decisions. Even though she ultimately would take her ideas to the first presidency for approval, they came from her. She wasn't handed a new theme from the brethren and told to include it in her conference talk. (The Young Women Theme is recited at the beginning of each Sunday young women meeting). Rather, as she and her presidency worked together, they realized that it was time to make changes to the theme that had been in place for several years. 

So, they prayed, discussed with their board members, asked previous Young Women general leaders, and really worked at it. Sister Cordon talked about her many sleepless nights as she pondered and sought guidance for what it needed to be. They weren't working to try and make the theme the best they could make it, they were working to discover through revelation how Jesus Christ would have it. Sister Cordon even joked about the Holy Ghost really enjoying providing guidance at 2:00 in the morning. 

Hearing first-hand from her about how the Young Women program modifications came from her presidency felt empowering. I have so much more appreciation for what these women do, and really feel proud to be part of an organization run by such inspired female leaders.

We really need to use the name Young Women. In General Conference, Sister Cordon explained that our old naming system for our classes would be discontinued. We used to have names for each age group- laurels, mia-maids, and beehives. But with the retirement of these names, "all classes will be referred to by the unifying name of 'Young Women.'" (See here for her full address).

This has been very challenging in practice. It is much harder to distinguish between classes if they all have the same name. As Sister Cordon talked about how this decision was made, her concerns and frustrations felt very familiar. She admitted that at first it seemed too confusing to call everyone young women. She understood that differentiating each class would be hard. She herself fought the inspiration and worried that it wouldn't be as fun or as easy without names for each class. But over and over again, the revelation came from the Lord that all of the classes should be called by the name of Young Women. When identifying a specific class is necessary, it can be distinguished by adding the age of the young women in that class.

I think that if the Lord was that insistent that we not label each class, we should be working diligently to alter our vocabulary to always use "young women" when talking about all or part of these youth. If we are saying "formerly known as laurels" or "the 12-13 year olds," we are missing out on the unification that the Lord intends for us to achieve as a result of this adjustment. Sister Cordon said, "I am 100% confident, with all of my being, that the Lord wants the unifying name to be Young Women."

Successful class presidencies make for a successful young women program. I don't know if this is true everywhere, but the young women I work with are so intelligent, savvy, silly, fun, insightful, kind and just wonderful. They have everything it takes to be successful at whatever we ask them to do. And yet, they also don't have much experience in anything we ask them to do. As a leader, my job is to guide and direct them through things they haven't done much or at all- while still tapping in to the brilliance and individuality that each of these girls possess.

Each age group in the Young Women program has their own presidency made up of young women from that class. They are supposed to plan their weekday activities, teach Sunday lessons, and look out for each other at church, school and home. Their leaders are supposed to guide them to accomplish all of those things.

A successful program is one where the leaders provide just the right amount of independence within a structure, and the youth respond with creativity and responsibility. This is not an easy line to find, let alone walk on. But as we work toward it together, miracles will start to happen.

If you want to hear some of this stuff for yourself, check out the whole Young Women General Presidency on the Latter-Day Saint Women Podcast. A few of the same topics are mentioned, and you'll even get to hear from someone else about love that Sister Cordon exudes. I highly recommend it! Listen here.

Meeting Jean B. Bingham

Background

On Saturday, November 10, 2019, I got to meet Sister Jean B. Bingham. Sister Bingham serves as the General Relief Society President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I attended a meeting where we all ate dinner (a plethora of crock-pots full of soup), and then sat down to listen to some inspiring words that Sister Bingham shared. I loved seeing her mingle with us as we ate our meal. She was so unassuming, graceful and meek. Hearing her talk, she is soft-spoken and tender. She moves slowly and gently, not with a lot of force.

Yet to me she is so powerful! Something about her messages really speak to me. Several years ago she gave a talk that truly touched me. She articulated truths that I have believed for a long time, and motivated me to live them better. Isn't that true power? Enlightening and empowering those around you? Ever since that talk, I have eagerly listened to her words whenever I've had the opportunity.



While at dinner, I went and introduced myself to her. I normally don't do that sort of thing, but I found myself stealing a seat next to her as she sat down with her soup. I was so nervous I'm not even sure I looked her in the eye. When she could see I didn't have anything more to say besides my name and how excited I was to meet her, she asked what capacity I serve in the Church. Before I could answer someone else interrupted us. I should have just taken the opportunity to leave, but I didn't. I waited for a minute or two, then asked if I could get a picture with her, which she obliged without hesitation. Then I quickly told her how much I had loved the talk she gave (referenced above), and basically ran away.

Yup. I was about as articulate and put together as a teenager meeting her favorite boy band. I am pretty disappointed that I squandered what is likely to be my one and only chance to meet her, but it was still pretty special to spend the evening with her. Even in my awkward introduction, she didn't seem annoyed or bothered at all. She put her arm around me for our picture. She seemed genuinely happy to meet me and not even bothered that I was interrupting her short time to eat before speaking to everyone.

As always, hearing from her that night was inspiring. Here are a few of the things she shared:

Summary

A lot of changes have been made in the Church. Sometimes we don't understand why we are being asked to do certain things. From her experience, Sister Bingham has found that as she tries out new things even if she doesn't understand, that eventually she is able to look back and see the why.

We need to remember that all of the many changes are not isolated in and of themselves. Each adjustment is meant to work together to help us prepare to meet God.

As the largest organization of women in the world, the Relief Society is very diverse. Women come from every walk of life and almost every country to participate in Relief Society. From this diversity, we can create unity! One of the ways we can do this is by trying to see each other as God sees us.

Sister Bingham referenced a talk by Brother Peter Johnson that talked about the 3 D's of the adversary: Deception, Distraction and Discouragement. Then she suggested a fourth D: Division. We cannot succeed as a community unless we are united! To that end, we need to be doing more than just including everyone. It is good to include others. But what people really need is a place where they belong. We can create belonging by focusing on loving others, and not dwelling on what we perceive to be their shortcomings. As we do this, we will be changed for the better!

Remember that everything we do has a spiritual component. The Lord will help us know what should take priority in our lives, and He will guide us and help us improve.

My Two Cents

Honestly, whenever I think about what she said, the only thing I can remember without looking at my notes is that part about division. One of Satan's tools is division. It is something that has been on my mind for a while now. I love how she paired that thought with the idea that we can be unified in diversity. We don't need to try and be the same! We don't need to mold each other to our idea of what's best. Rather, we can embrace our differences, and learn and grow from them. Wouldn't that make for a much stronger, interesting whole?

I think this is a great lesson for all of us right now.